Hosts Thoughts on the old “Something Came Up” Cancellation (6 Viewers)

[merkong]

I play a cash game that I think is very limited invite only once a month. I was up front with the host as soon as I was invited in that there would be games that I wasn’t able to attend because of vacation and work travel. I think that he has a good pen of backup players that he can reach out to if he needs to fill a seat that I or other regulars can’t fill in any particular game. Just keep some backups in the queue for cases like this and reach out with at least a week’s notice so you can know who’s gonna be there and how many seats you need to fill.

So this host expects players to commit eternally?

It’s always week to week. Being a weekly Friday game that has run over 500 sessions, Saturday morning I reach out to players to thank them, chew the fat and inquire about the upcoming Friday. We have a comeback rate of a little over 80%. Once established where I’m at, I go into the 40+ deep Rolodex and start sending out inquires two at a time. I’ve run a full table over 90% of those 500+ sessions.

This isn’t necessarily, or at all about someone taking time away from the cloth. As I said, on average about 2 seats turn over each week. This is about a player late canceling, and when done with a flimsy excuse - true or not - and how to react and respond and keep one’s sanity.

Thanks for the response.

Ken (merkong) 500+ Sessions Spread
Owner/Operator/Founder:
*The Godfather Club MN (The Venue)
*The Executive Game, (The Current Game)
*Frogtown Card Club, St. Paul (Retired Venue)
*The Poker Family (Our Philosophy)

The Godfather Club - Minnesota | Poker Chip Forum

 

[MrCatPants]

I didn't think of that part.
Main hope is that there's already cash game going that I could join late and try to invite guys to mine.

Many hosts would really frown at that last point. Most people only have so much poker in them and coming with the intent to start up a competing game would get you disinvited fast.

My advice is to try to join for a few months before quietly extending a couple of select invites.

 

[Sparkynutz]

Many hosts would really frown at that last point. Most people only have so much poker in them and coming with the intent to start up a competing game would get you disinvited fast.

My advice is to try to join for a few months before quietly extending a couple of select invites.

Since they are already full, what about the guys on their waiting list?
Gotta be other locals that wanna play and can't get in there too.
Heck I'd darn near give anyone a chance just to get my game going better.

 

[merkong]

I didn't think of that part.
Main hope is that there's already cash game going that I could join late and try to invite guys to mine.

I can’t speak for the entirety but it’s sort of a complicated and unwritten tenet that one shouldn’t recruit players for their game while at a game. The more clandestine approach, while with it still comes with blowback is to do it in another setting.

If someone were to have the depleted insight to do that at my game they’d better hope theirs takes off because they’d likely not be at mine again.

That said, do what you have to do and any players that leave a game ongoingly for another are welcome to do so. The host would need to look at what they are doing or not doing to be losing players.

It’s never happened to me in over 10 years of hosting.

Go me!

 

[merkong]

Since they are already full, what about the guys on their waiting list?
Gotta be other locals that wanna play and can't get in there too.
Heck I'd darn near give anyone a chance just to get my game going better.

You’re not really getting this “hosting thing” are you… Maybe I’m old school or missing something.

I paid a visit to a new prospect last evening just to say hello and that we’d be looking forward to his audition soon.

It’s called recruiting and not necessarily in the sense of pilfering players from other games.

Get out there and build your game.

Maybe it’s just me…

I doubt it though.

 

[Sparkynutz]

You’re not really getting this “hosting thing” are you… Maybe I’m old school or missing something.

I paid a visit to a new prospect last evening just to say hello and that we’d be looking forward to his audition soon.

It’s called recruiting and not necessarily in the sense of pilfering players from other games.

Get out there and build your game.

Maybe it’s just me…

I doubt it though.

Lol. Wish it was that easy. All the games I know if are an hour from me. Nobody wants to drive to my tiny town for poker.

 

[krafticus]

I can’t speak for the entirety but it’s sort of a complicated and unwritten tenet that one shouldn’t recruit players for their game while at a game. The more clandestine approach, while with it still comes with blowback is to do it in another setting.

If someone were to have the depleted insight to do that at my game they’d better hope theirs takes off because they’d likely not be at mine again.

That said, do what you have to do and any players that leave a game ongoingly for another are welcome to do so. The host would need to look at what they are doing or not doing to be losing players.

It’s never happened to me in over 10 years of hosting.

Go me!

maybe for a weekly game that holds true. For a monthly game (and maybe it's just me), You can make an announcement at my game that you want players in your game, and I'm cool with it, as long as I'm invited too. Just don't schedule your game the same time as mine. ;-)

 

[merkong]

Lol. Wish it was that easy. All the games I know if are an hour from me. Nobody wants to drive to my tiny town for poker.

Well, from the sounds of it logistically, you’re not in the position to start hosting. Make the drive and play elsewhere. Recruit players in your immediate area and start with cheap tourneys. Monthly and then twice and eventually, if there’s an appetite, a dirt cheap cash game (.10/.10). And spread some food.

It’s all in my upcoming book “Philosophical Musings of a Home Poker Host.”

You’re in a unique spot but if you create a game that has some traction, you’ll be the only game in town and will have your own wait list.

Also, never be boxed in by numbers.

Play 5,6,7 handed… Just start building and as legend has it, they will come.

Someday you’ll have a game that you’re as proud of as other hosts are of what they’ve built.

Ken (merkong) 500+ Sessions Spread
Owner/Operator/Founder:
*The Godfather Club MN (The Venue)
*The Executive Game, (The Current Game)
*Frogtown Card Club, St. Paul (Retired Venue)
*The Poker Family (Our Philosophy)

The Godfather Club - Minnesota | Poker Chip Forum

 

[merkong]

maybe for a weekly game that holds true. For a monthly game (and maybe it's just me), You can make an announcement at my game that you want players in your game, and I'm cool with it, as long as I'm invited too. Just don't schedule your game the same time as mine. ;-)

Monthly games, you are correct sir, different ethics. Some hosts might still be a bit off put and I would never do it, but you are correct the monthly is in a different, grayer, area on matters such as this.

 

[Sparkynutz]

Well, from the sounds of it logistically, you’re not in the position to start hosting. Make the drive and play elsewhere. Recruit players in your immediate area and start with cheap tourneys. Monthly and then twice and eventually, if there’s an appetite, a dirt cheap cash game (.10/.10). And spread some food.

It’s all in my upcoming book “Philosophical Musings of a Home Poker Host.”

You’re in a unique spot but if you create a game that has some traction, you’ll be the only game in town and will have your own wait list.

Also, never be boxed in by numbers.

Play 5,6,7 handed… Just start building and as legend has it, they will come.

Someday you’ll have a game that you’re as proud of as other hosts are of what they’ve built.

Ken (merkong) 500+ Sessions Spread
Owner/Operator/Founder:
*The Godfather Club MN (The Venue)
*The Executive Game, (The Current Game)
*Frogtown Card Club, St. Paul (Retired Venue)
*The Poker Family (Our Philosophy)

The Godfather Club - Minnesota | Poker Chip Forum

Hard to get the word out which is why I've been trying to go to games for years. Even driving to farther games is mostly pointless. The guys there won't drive that far to mine so no point in trying to recruit an hour away. The other thing is many of the farther big city games play higher stakes or raked or both. Driving an hour to donate $100 in an hour and head home isn't much fun. It's a little different if it's a yearly pcf meetup somewhere but that isn't often.

If the local 3 table tournament I just found out about has people interested in low stakes earlier in the day games or know someone who does that can't get in these tournaments due to schedule my game may benefit along with them being able to play.

Most of the spur of the moment games locally are with my neighbors who mainly play super turbo tournaments for $5. These guys rarely stray from their set in their ways short stack dice chips and last minute invites 5 minutes before starting a game because they have enough family over already.
I have nice chips, I want to use them dammit lol.

I also don't have the time or funds to engage in weekly play.
If I can't recruit die hards that's fine.
I just need some respectable buys who show up, and like food.
If that hurts a 3 table game with a waiting list then they probably aren't catering to the guys as much as they are being the only option around.

 

[merkong]

Hard to get the word out which is why I've been trying to go to games for years. Even driving to farther games is mostly pointless. The guys there won't drive that far to mine so no point in trying to recruit an hour away. The other thing is many of the farther big city games play higher stakes or raked or both. Driving an hour to donate $100 in an hour and head home isn't much fun. It's a little different if it's a yearly pcf meetup somewhere but that isn't often.

If the local 3 table tournament I just found out about has people interested in low stakes earlier in the day games or know someone who does that can't get in these tournaments due to schedule my game may benefit along with them being able to play.

Most of the spur of the moment games locally are with my neighbors who mainly play super turbo tournaments for $5. These guys rarely stray from their set in their ways short stack dice chips and last minute invites 5 minutes before starting a game because they have enough family over already.
I have nice chips, I want to use them dammit lol.

I also don't have the time or funds to engage in weekly play.
If I can't recruit die hards that's fine.
I just need some respectable buys who show up, and like food.
If that hurts a 3 table game with a waiting list then they probably aren't catering to the guys as much as they are being the only option around.

You make some valid points. If you’re not going head up to the large monthly on the regular then yeah, when you’re there get the word out, innocuously, and see what happens. Finding players that already play is a head start but when you find players that don’t even know they’d like to engage here and there… Well those players are yours.

Find the hybrid; gently get the word out that you’re considering starting a non-competing game, look for complete noobs to the game, backfill with relatives, co-workers, cash in favors, do whatever you have to do. Set the expectations accordingly and don’t step on any toes.

It sounds like you’ve got hosting genetics or at least are willing to take on such a thankless job at least out of your desire to have a convenient game at your disposal. That’s where a lot of hosts begin.

Listen to experienced hosts and once you get your footing the game can be whatever you want it to be and you’ll have your own flock to worry about.

Now, get to it and good luck.

 

[MrCatPants]

Hard to get the word out which is why I've been trying to go to games for years. Even driving to farther games is mostly pointless. The guys there won't drive that far to mine so no point in trying to recruit an hour away. The other thing is many of the farther big city games play higher stakes or raked or both. Driving an hour to donate $100 in an hour and head home isn't much fun. It's a little different if it's a yearly pcf meetup somewhere but that isn't often.

If the local 3 table tournament I just found out about has people interested in low stakes earlier in the day games or know someone who does that can't get in these tournaments due to schedule my game may benefit along with them being able to play.

Most of the spur of the moment games locally are with my neighbors who mainly play super turbo tournaments for $5. These guys rarely stray from their set in their ways short stack dice chips and last minute invites 5 minutes before starting a game because they have enough family over already.
I have nice chips, I want to use them dammit lol.

I also don't have the time or funds to engage in weekly play.
If I can't recruit die hards that's fine.
I just need some respectable buys who show up, and like food.
If that hurts a 3 table game with a waiting list then they probably aren't catering to the guys as much as they are being the only option around.

If you want to host then you may have to move? If you are not convenient to players it will be extremely hard.

My game started because the host moved out to the far suburbs. Game ran like twice more and fizzled. I resurrected it and combined it with another dead game and grew it from there.

 

[merkong]

If you want to host then you may have to move? If you are not convenient to players it will be extremely hard.

My game started because the host moved out to the far suburbs. Game ran like twice more and fizzled. I resurrected it and combined it with another dead game and grew it from there.

 

[krafticus]

Hard to get the word out which is why I've been trying to go to games for years. Even driving to farther games is mostly pointless. The guys there won't drive that far to mine so no point in trying to recruit an hour away. The other thing is many of the farther big city games play higher stakes or raked or both. Driving an hour to donate $100 in an hour and head home isn't much fun. It's a little different if it's a yearly pcf meetup somewhere but that isn't often.

If the local 3 table tournament I just found out about has people interested in low stakes earlier in the day games or know someone who does that can't get in these tournaments due to schedule my game may benefit along with them being able to play.

Most of the spur of the moment games locally are with my neighbors who mainly play super turbo tournaments for $5. These guys rarely stray from their set in their ways short stack dice chips and last minute invites 5 minutes before starting a game because they have enough family over already.
I have nice chips, I want to use them dammit lol.

I also don't have the time or funds to engage in weekly play.
If I can't recruit die hards that's fine.
I just need some respectable buys who show up, and like food.
If that hurts a 3 table game with a waiting list then they probably aren't catering to the guys as much as they are being the only option around.

Reach out to the host of that game, and see if they mind you asking players for your game. Be honest, and let them know when you plan on playing. They might even have players that would prefer a smaller game that he'd prioritize giving you. I mean, the worst thing he can say is no

 

[timinater]

I don't really care. I'm not borrowing trouble by stressing out about the "why" of someone not being able to make it.

I ask my players to RSVP and like to have an idea of how many are coming on a given night of course, but our tournaments on a 3ish week rotation get somewhere from 7-14 runners. I'll set up in such a way that I'm flexible. Life happens. I don't have a black and white rule about people flaking at the last minute. These people either self select out or at some point I kind of stop sending the invites when I've seen enough.

There are also some players where yes means maybe, maybe means no and no also means no.

Post pandemic there was a bit of an issue with people flaking or whatever as everyone was out of the habit of live poker. I took a bit more active approach in inviting/confirming/following up on RSVPs during that period.

 

[merkong]

Reach out to the host of that game, and see if they mind you asking players for your game. Be honest, and let them know when you plan on playing. They might even have players that would prefer a smaller game that he'd prioritize giving you. I mean, the worst thing he can say is no

 

[Sparkynutz]

Reach out to the host of that game, and see if they mind you asking players for your game. Be honest, and let them know when you plan on playing. They might even have players that would prefer a smaller game that he'd prioritize giving you. I mean, the worst thing he can say is no

Kinda my thoughts.
Thanks for suggesting that as well.

 

[merkong]

I don't really care. I'm not borrowing trouble by stressing out about the "why" of someone not being able to make it.

I ask my players to RSVP and like to have an idea of how many are coming on a given night of course, but our tournaments on a 3ish week rotation get somewhere from 7-14 runners. I'll set up in such a way that I'm flexible. Life happens. I don't have a black and white rule about people flaking at the last minute. These people either self select out or at some point I kind of stop sending the invites when I've seen enough.

There are also some players where yes means maybe, maybe means no and no also means no.

Post pandemic there was a bit of an issue with people flaking or whatever as everyone was out of the habit of live poker. I took a bit more active approach in inviting/confirming/following up on RSVPs during that period.

The more laid back approach definitely has merit. Hosts have enough to worry about.

Even though my crew knows we’ll take the cloth a hand or two shorter no problemo, their concern is that numbers at the start affect numbers at midnight which affect numbers between 0100 and 0200.

My biggest concern really is what chip set I’m spreading on any Friday night and if I have enough vapes to get me until 2 or 3 am.

Pet the sweaty things and not the stress invoking derivative right?

Host on Host!

 

[4SUMERZ]

I host a monthly cash game. I also play weekly at another person's cash game. Only 1 of the players at the weekly game play at my monthly game.
The weekly game is strictly Omaha, and others only favor this format. My game is 90% hold'em and 10% pineapple.
Both our games are played on an 8 player table. I have a regular player list, which get 1st refusal. I send out notices 5 days out, and want an answer 2 days prior to the set date, or I go to the spare list to fill the table.
Most times, I get the 8 each month. I would like to invite some on the spare list more often, but it only happens occasionally.
What gets me is "I'll let you know" response then don't hear from them by the deadline set.
I then go to the spare list, and get a player committed, then I get the other to let me know they can play.. .sorry, I don't have a seat available.
It pains me to have to tell them, but the deadline was there for everyone.
I don't penalize them for the next game, but if it would continue to happen, then they would be dropped to the bottom of the spare list.
As far as late cancellations, they happen...luckily it is one rare occasion, but some on my spare list players will play on a moments notice, so that is a plus.

 

[Sparkynutz]

Reach out to the host of that game, and see if they mind you asking players for your game. Be honest, and let them know when you plan on playing. They might even have players that would prefer a smaller game that he'd prioritize giving you. I mean, the worst thing he can say is no

New guy that plays weekly with host stopped over tonight to buy a boatload of chips and trays off me to try and get his friends to play more at his house. I can definitely see playing with this kid in the future. Very polite and I'm pretty sure I know his grandmother that lives rather close to me.
I got more info on this 3 table weekly tournament also.
$25 to play, $5 goes towards food. Pays 3 places. Starts at 7pm with unlimited rebuys till 930pm and no cash game. People sometimes stick around for the food but majority of people leave right after busting and this kid is one of the few there that doesn't mind playing late.
Sounds like that may be why he gets in the money if other guys are sick of playing and just play their hands loose to go home.
Maybe that's why there isn't a cash game too?
Me hosting earlier hours may help me gain some guys if that's the case.
About half of them live in my town but didn't get any names. Small town, I probably know them. Just a matter of time to find out.

I'll definitely ask host permission to recruit at his game if I can make it there. Or there may be opportunity to host my ideal game there.
Dealers choice cash limit games. 25c ante, 25c bets with 3 raise max, $1 on last Street.

 

[Taghkanic]

For once I had the opposite of a flake-out happen:

Me: Game on Thursday, you in?

Reg: Nah, I’m going to [a casino 1.5 hours away]

Me: Some people just love rake, lol

Reg [who lives 20 mins from me]: I got a free room

Me: Oh, nice deal. The wife charges you to sleep at home now?

—Thursday—

[My game has been underway for a couple hours]

Reg: This [casino] game sucks, will you have a seat in a couple hours?

Me: Should have one open by then

Reg shows up around 11 pm and plays until 3

 

[Sparkynutz]

For once I had the opposite of a flake-out happen:

Me: Game on Thursday, you in?

Reg: Nah, I’m going to [a casino 1.5 hours away]

Me: Some people just love rake, lol

Reg [who lives 20 mins from me]: I got a free room

Me: Oh, nice deal. The wife charges you to sleep at home now?

—Thursday—

[My game has been underway for a couple hours]

Reg: This [casino] game sucks, will you have a seat in a couple hours?

Me: Should have one open by then

Reg shows up around 11 pm and plays until 3

Nice! I don't get people liking to play with rake either.
Guy an hour away from me keeps trying to get me to come play his cash games and bring guys but he charges for seat, for food, and also rake per hand. He rents a house just to host games 3x a week and somehow has lots of guys playing. I can't see how anybody has fun besides host raking in the rake. I've seen pics of full tables and $1k+ pots. Too rich for my blood. My $100 would be gone in 5 minutes.

 

[Nymor]

I got more info on this 3 table weekly tournament also.
$25 to play, $5 goes towards food. Pays 3 places.

A 3 table rebuy tournie that only pays the top 3 - seems a bit tight.

Saying that my pub league is a 3 table, no rebuy, tournie that only pays the top 3 but that's more because of ridic UK gambling laws than anything else.

(In the UK pub games can only pay out a total of £100 per day, a figure that was set in the 1970s and one that the casino lobby ensure stays as it is. Many places ignore it but my local was reported once a few years ago so has stuck by the legal max since. There is a carve out in the law for cribbage which can be played for unlimited stakes for some, completely legit and not at all corrupt, reason)

 

[merkong]

A 3 table rebuy tournie that only pays the top 3 - seems a bit tight.

I will not disagree.

 

[upNdown]

A 3 table rebuy tournie that only pays the top 3 - seems a bit tight.

It's not so bad if it's a six-max.

 

[merkong]

It's not so bad if it's a six-max.

Three tables of heads up?

I want in!

 

[Munchies11]

As a host for 15 years I found that cash games are a lot easier to host than tournaments! Cash games are easier because you get the core 4 and work off that. With tournaments invites matter more because usually you need a set amount to have it and especially when you have multi tables. My experience serves me the best way to approach the maybes is to get the forsures out of the way and than hound the maybes until I get a definitive answer . It’s not the ideal approach but my guys don’t care like they used to if I said you can’t come to my next game they wouldn’t care fml lol that’s why now days we stick to 1 table cash games no bs… but damn I miss my tournies

 

[Munchies11]

I have a 2-strike approach.
If you have replied yes to my game and don't show up, and I have to text/call/email you to find out what's up -- that's strike 1. If you do it again, I don't call/text and I drop you from my invite list. I've also made that well known to my players, and 99% follow that rule. yes, I've removed people. I've given them their warnings.

Some people, I'll let back on the list, some I won't. If you've been coming to my game for 15 years, and this happens, I'll chat in private, but I'll let you know it pissed me off. Newer people, I tell them that they'll know it happened when they stop getting invites.

Way to lay down the law!! Your games must mean something to be able to do this. That’s a good sign of an excellent host ! Keep er up

 

[merkong]

As a host for 15 years I found that cash games are a lot easier to host than tournaments! Cash games are easier because you get the core 4 and work off that. With tournaments invites matter more because usually you need a set amount to have it and especially when you have multi tables. My experience serves me the best way to approach the maybes is to get the forsures out of the way and than hound the maybes until I get a definitive answer . It’s not the ideal approach but my guys don’t care like they used to if I said you can’t come to my next game they wouldn’t care fml lol that’s why now days we stick to 1 table cash games no bs… but damn I miss my tournies

That’s exactly how the Executive Game evolved. Fussing with people that play poker v. poker players.

Cash. Cash. Cash. Did I say Cash?

 

[Sparkynutz]

I will not disagree.

Ditto, but he said its 3 tables of 10.
With who knows how many rebuys in an hour and a half only paying 3 places is kinda shitty.
I'm kind of curious what other nonsense goes on there?
It's amazing that that many people play weekly with no seats available for people trying to join.
If I can create a much nicer environment my game should be able to take off once I get the word out.
People may not be picky if it's the only game around.

A friend of mine said I should talk to her neighbor sometime that he plays monthly with his friends. He's a doctor and most of his friends that play are doctors or lawyers etc. She hasn't ran into him since telling me that a few months ago but said she'd give him my number if he ever needed an extra guy.
Probably higher stakes but that's just a guess. I've been tempted to put a letter in his mailbox atleast offering some 3d printed poker products to get the ball rolling. I know where he lives about 3 blocks from me.

I'm hosting Friday Dec 20th, we'll see how that goes since I'll have a few new guys this time. Tempted to reach out to the 3 table tournament host to invite him or ask if he has any pointers. Worst he could say is no.