Event #4 is in the books. Fate. Fortune. A Legend Reborn.
They’ll sing songs about this one. The week when the universe aligned, Mercury was in retro-grade and fate took the wheel as one man luckboxed his way to eternal glory. Event #4 of season 12 wasn’t just a poker game—it was a cosmic reckoning, a manifestation of destiny wrapped in bad beats and miracle rivers. The league’s long-dormant host descended from his cash game perch, dusted off his poker chops, and proceeded to forever cement his legacy in the Moxie-Generacy record books.
Why the sudden return? Fate - as it turns out - works in mysterious ways. The cash game didn’t run because its usual cast of degenerates had other commitments—presumably attending underground Rubik’s Cube competitions or giving TED Talks on the art of procrastination. And Sandie? She was halfway to the game when disaster struck. Her husband, Bob Morris, reportedly sent a frantic, all-caps text after realizing his most “functional yet fashionable” swimwear (rumored to be neon green tankini with built-in lumbar support) was missing. With no other choice,
Sandie was forced to turn around at the last minute, regrettably leaving the league with an awkward number of players to start.
Enter your not-so-humble host. Never one to let the game stumble out of the gate, Moxie Mike recognized a duty to be fulfilled and gallantly sat in to fill the void left by the Elf's sudden absence, questioning his life choices along the way. Little did anyone know, The Poker Gods had big plans for this most fateful evening.
The Game Unfolds: A Masterclass in Adaptation and Favorable Fortunes
Crediting years of navigating the chaos of
real poker mixed cash games, where players juggle 4, 5, 6 or even 7 hole cards at a time, the host made that goofy two-card game look like carnival fodder. The '
kiddy game' wasn't down the street on this night - no it was right here in the Moxie-Palazzo!
Calculated aggression and razor-sharp reads carried him through the night. But every great performance needs a little drama, and the occasional misstep was no exception. Enter the poker gods, who gleefully disregarded logic, reason and basic human decency while serving up one fortuitous river card after another at just the right moments, keeping the 9-time winner from the rail time and time again.
The Aftermath: The Poker Gods Smile Upon Moxie Mike!
When the final hand was dealt after a 45 minute heads up battle with Queen Alexis, the host had secured his place in the hallowed
10-Win Club, alongside Crown Royal Dave as the only two members in this exclusive group. A mix of skill and divine intervention carried him to the top, leaving the rest of the league's constituents shaking their heads in disbelief.
Yes - a cheesy picture to commemorate the occasion was absolutely necessary:
If only the winning hand had been a Queen and a 6
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I was asked if I would be defending the Red Puck - only if there's no cash game. If so, it seems only fitting to put the bounty on Sandie since it's her fault I participated in the first place.
On Tuesday, to kick off the celebration of Event #4's most historic outcome we'll be having 10-topping pizzas brought in, and since we're anticipating a lower-than usual turnout for event #5, the break add on will include an extra 10k chips in a symbolic gesture commemorating the awesomeness that is all things Moxie Mike. We'll also throw some dogs on the roller if anyone wants them.
