• This site contains affiliate links. If you choose to make a purchase after clicking a link, Poker Chip Forum may receive a commission at no additional cost to you. Thank you for your support!

Urgent Poker and Airbnb fundraiser (2 Viewers)

CraigT78

CraigT78

Royal Flush
Supporter Plus
Joined
Aug 4, 2015
Messages
18,340
Reaction score
53,153
Location
Dallas
** Urgent Poker & Airbnb Fundraiser **

Alright, degenerates and generous souls alike—it’s **Suicide Queen Melee** time! That’s right, four glorious days of **bluffing, bad beats, and questioning all my life choices in real-time**.

But here’s the thing… **poker buy-ins aren’t cheap, and neither is a roof over my head.** So, I’m officially launching the **“Keep Craig in the Game & Off the Streets” Fund.**

Your donations will go toward:
♠️ **Poker Buy-Ins** – Because folding is for quitters (and people with discipline).
♥️ **Airbnb Funds** – I *could* sleep in my car, but that’s where I keep my snacks.
♣️ **Emergency Tilt Recovery Beverages** – Just in case the river decides to personally attack me.
♦️ **Bail Money** – Unlikely, but you never know at Suicide Queen Melee.

Think of this as **an investment opportunity**—if I win big, I’ll name my next bad bluff after you. If I lose, well… at least you can say you supported the arts (because poker is absolutely a performance).

**Venmo: @Craig-Cislo**

Let’s make this trip legendary. #SuicideQueenMelee #PokerFund #BluffForRent
 
Am I doing this right?
IMG_6833.jpeg
 
Mook.

Just showing people me and my account are safe and all is well at The Godfather Club. Good luck with your fundraising.
 
I got you for 10% 1% 0.1% euh....sending $50 & 3 IOU's for an old fashion at the Degen World Championship

Let's goooooooooo bro

Ps. dibs on car snack
 
Last edited:
quintooo said:
do investors get a prospectus?
Click to expand...

CraigT78 High-Volatility Poker Fund
An Investment Opportunity Like No Other (For Better or Worse)

Fund Overview:
The CraigT78 High-Volatility Poker Fund ("CT78 Fund") is a speculative, high-risk, high-entertainment-value investment vehicle focused on the unpredictable and often precarious decision-making matrix of Dallas-based poker player CraigT78. This fund offers investors exposure to extreme fluctuations, potential degeneracy, and an uncertain but exciting future, hinging on Craig's consumption of Old Fashioneds and his ability to navigate the treacherous market conditions known as "2 Drugs."

Investment Objective:
The CT78 Fund seeks to achieve maximum upside or glorious self-destruction by leveraging Craig's innate poker skills, irrational confidence, and an unwavering belief that "this time, the bluff will work." The fund has no fixed strategy, as it largely depends on vibes and whether Craig slept the night before.

Risk Profile:

  • HIGH VOLATILITY – CraigT78 exhibits unprecedented swings in performance, often within a single hand. Investors should prepare for heart palpitations.
  • UNCERTAIN RETURNS – While some nights Craig rides an unstoppable heater, others devolve into existential crises at 3 AM in a Waffle House.
  • LIQUIDITY CONCERNS – All capital is immediately converted into circus game buy-ins, Old Fashioneds, and questionable prop bets.
  • MARKET CONDITIONS – The presence of "2 Drugs" (or even rumors thereof) significantly increases variance, often resulting in unexpected all-in decisions based on spiritual guidance rather than pot odds.
Key Performance Indicators:

  • Pre-Game Old Fashioned Index (PGOFI): A predictive model tracking the number of Old Fashioneds consumed before tournament play. Moderate consumption correlates with peak performance, while excessive intake results in Craig "seeing through the Matrix" but forgetting basic poker rules.
  • The Degen-to-Discipline Ratio (D2D): A crucial measure of whether Craig will stick to solid poker fundamentals or attempt a 5-bet shove with 8-7 low because "he felt it."
  • Waffle House Recovery Curve (WHRC): Tracks Craig’s ability to rebuild after catastrophic losses through greasy food, over-the-table analysis, and questionable life decisions.
Investment Thesis:

  1. Potential for Explosive Growth – On a good day, CraigT78 has been known to turn $100 into $10,000, demonstrating an elite ability to outmaneuver weaker competition and/or leverage opponent intoxication levels to his advantage.
  2. Innovative, Non-Traditional Strategy – Unlike traditional poker investors who rely on GTO (Game Theory Optimal) strategy, CraigT78 operates on a hybrid model known as YOLO (You Only Live Once), wherein the metagame shifts at his whim.
  3. The X-Factor – The fund’s success is heavily correlated with "The Zone," an ephemeral state where Craig exhibits god-like reads and unshakable confidence. Investors should note that entering "The Zone" often requires precisely three Old Fashioneds and a dealer named Gina.

Legal Disclaimers:

  • Past performance is not indicative of future results.
  • The CT78 Fund is not FDIC insured, nor is it legally recognized by any governing body that values fiscal responsibility.
  • All investments are subject to risk, including but not limited to: getting slow-rolled by a cowboy named @Schmendr1ck, making side bets with questionable individuals, and watching Craig attempt 3 street "pot"-bluff that backfires spectacularly.
  • This is not financial advice. This is a cry for help.
For more information, or to receive a complimentary Waffle House menu and one (1) free life lesson from CraigT78, please contact our investor relations team via carrier pigeon or psychic vision board.**
Click to expand...
 
Maximum upside or glorious self destruction. It's like my personal mission statement.
 
Will Schedule K-1s be available and will they be deductible? Asking for some friends who never got one after losing all their investments in a Barbecue restaurant who might be interested or not.
 

Create an account or login to comment

You must be a member in order to leave a comment

Create account

Create an account and join our community. It's easy!

Register

Log in

Already have an account? Log in here.

Back
Top Bottom