Fugly Poker Table Thread (20 Viewers)

[Teach42]

I don't get how something that even comes into existence.

 

[FordPickup92]

I don't get how something that even comes into existence.

Maybe the players are really really chubby and they had to accommodate?

 

[allforcharity]

Four

Thousand

Eight

Hundred

Dollars.

"Fold."

 

[Poker Zombie]

Somewhere, there is a Brazilian hardwood tree crying.

 

[Mr Winberg]

Not far from where I live and in near mint condition:

@HMK, you've been going on and on about how you want a kidney shaped poker table with a little wooden island in the middle. Well, here's your chance!

 

[Highli99]

Not far from where I live and in near mint condition:

View attachment 377363

@HMK, you've been going on and on about how you want a kidney shaped poker table with a little wooden island in the middle. Well, here's your chance!
View attachment 377364

is that bloodstain on the table back right?

 

[Poker Zombie]

is that bloodstain on the table back right?

Yes, but it was from a bad menstrual cycle, not murder... so there's that...

 

[FordPickup92]

Not far from where I live and in near mint condition:

View attachment 377363

@HMK, you've been going on and on about how you want a kidney shaped poker table with a little wooden island in the middle. Well, here's your chance!
View attachment 377364

Top notch!

 

[bigdonkey]

Yes, but it was from a bad menstrual cycle, not murder... so there's that...

If you're able to climb up on a poker table to do it, it can't be that bad.

 

[Mr Winberg]

If you're able to climb up on a poker table to do it, it can't be that bad.

Well someone has been screwing on the table alright!

Spoiler

 

[MrCatPants]

Not far from where I live and in near mint condition:

View attachment 377363

@HMK, you've been going on and on about how you want a kidney shaped poker table with a little wooden island in the middle. Well, here's your chance!
View attachment 377364

Whenever I see these types of things I wonder if anyone tried to talk them down. Wooden island in the middle...lol.

 

[APatHand]

Artistic license

 

[Solid Snake]

The rail caught my attention.

 

[bigdonkey]

The rail caught my attention.
View attachment 378485

Base looks super-stable though.

 

[sir bluffs alot]

5 sided Poker Table - $4800

View attachment 376329

What a steal!
https://cosprings.craigslist.org/fuo/d/cascade-5-sided-poker-table/7026242839.html

I had a Chrysler once...

 

[rowlin]

Has anyone booked an appointment yet to view it?

 

[Beakertwang]

Which is Uglier?

The original?

Or @bigdonkey's Ultimate Iowa version? (Don't worry, this is just photoshopped)

 

[bigdonkey]

Whoever gives the best response wins a pic of @Beakertwang in his underoos:

 

[Beakertwang]

Whoever gives the best response wins a pic of @Beakertwang in his underoos:
View attachment 378516

Mine have baby corn.

 

[stocky]

Not far from where I live and in near mint condition:



@HMK, you've been going on and on about how you want a kidney shaped poker table with a little wooden island in the middle. Well, here's your chance!

the trifecta, nice

 

[FordPickup92]

Which is Uglier?

The original?
View attachment 378515

Or @bigdonkey's Ultimate Iowa version? (Don't worry, this is just photoshopped)
View attachment 378512

The corn is terrible, like what in the actual fuck. The camo is sweet, I'd rock that. Rail could use some improvement, not sure how I feel about the skin color... lol

 

[Phantom]

"One of a kind (thank goodness) handcrafted 6 person poker table 1200mm diameter x 800mm high, with drink holders, LED under lighting, stainless steel legs and weather proof cover." $500.

 

[dkersey]

"One of a kind (thank goodness) handcrafted 6 person poker table 1200mm diameter x 800mm high, with drink holders, LED under lighting, stainless steel legs and weather proof cover." $500.
View attachment 379989View attachment 379990View attachment 379991View attachment 379992View attachment 379993

I like the lights on the legs for absolutely no purpose...unless those are heating elements because the table is so fugly it is not allowed indoors.

 

[Sparty]

I think that area under the table is so that a miniature Obi Wan Kenobe can sneak under there and shut down the tractor beam on this Death Star table.

 

[sir bluffs alot]

Are those cup holders made of netting? Ingenious!

 

[FordPickup92]

"One of a kind (thank goodness) handcrafted 6 person poker table 1200mm diameter x 800mm high, with drink holders, LED under lighting, stainless steel legs and weather proof cover." $500.
View attachment 379989View attachment 379990View attachment 379991View attachment 379992View attachment 379993

I laughed so hard at this this is terrible!!!

 

[Poker Zombie]

Are those cup holders made of netting? Ingenious!

I had actually considered netting and leather strap (like a classy pool table) cup holders for my portable tables, as they essentially take up zero room. Decided against it because they are less stable, and I found I strongly prefer slide-unders. But if anyone buys one of those folding portable tables with built in cup holders that are only 1" deep, this is a viable alternative if you retained any macrame skills from childhood.

 

[allforcharity]

Can someone explain to me the need for extra-long netting under the cupholders? I mean, yeah, I just got back from Vegas and there are tons of people walking around with those 3 foot tall plastic daiguiri monstrosities, but I don't think anyone would drink one of those at this table. Or maybe I would, if only for the chance of deliberately spilling on it.

 

[Poker Zombie]

Can someone explain to me the need for extra-long netting under the cupholders? I mean, yeah, I just got back from Vegas and there are tons of people walking around with those 3 foot tall plastic daiguiri monstrosities, but I don't think anyone would drink one of those at this table. Or maybe I would, if only for the chance of deliberately spilling on it.

It's Australia, so I just assume all they drink is Fosters. On the plus side, smaller beverages will fit, you just push it up (from the bottom) through the table to get your drink. It's like an in-table card shuffler, but with beers.

Now I want to see if @T_Chan can make a table that delivers cold beers from under the rail at the push of a button...

 

[bigdonkey]

"One of a kind (thank goodness) handcrafted 6 person poker table 1200mm diameter x 800mm high, with drink holders, LED under lighting, stainless steel legs and weather proof cover." $500.
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