-
This site contains affiliate links. If you choose to make a purchase after clicking a link, Poker Chip Forum may receive a commission at no additional cost to you. Thank you for your support!
Derail and WTF Merge Thread (45 Viewers)
- Thread starter jbutler
- Start date
Chicken Rob
Full House
There needs to be a word for a sentence like that. It's like a word palindrome.
Reminds me of this: http://www.pastemagazine.com/articles/2009/02/demetri-martins-palindrome-poem.html
224-word palindrome by Demetri Martin (yeah, the comedian)
Dammit I’m mad.
Evil is a deed as I live.
God, am I reviled? I rise, my bed on a sun, I melt.
To be not one man emanating is sad. I piss.
Alas, it is so late. Who stops to help?
Man, it is hot. I’m in it. I tell.
I am not a devil. I level “Mad Dog”.
Ah, say burning is, as a deified gulp,
In my halo of a mired rum tin.
I erase many men. Oh, to be man, a sin.
Is evil in a clam? In a trap?
No. It is open. On it I was stuck.
Rats peed on hope. Elsewhere dips a web.
Be still if I fill its ebb.
Ew, a spider… eh?
We sleep. Oh no!
Deep, stark cuts saw it in one position.
Part animal, can I live? Sin is a name.
Both, one… my names are in it.
Murder? I’m a fool.
A hymn I plug, deified as a sign in ruby ash,
A Goddam level I lived at.
On mail let it in. I’m it.
Oh, sit in ample hot spots. Oh wet!
A loss it is alas (sip). I’d assign it a name.
Name not one bottle minus an ode by me:
“Sir, I deliver. I’m a dog”
Evil is a deed as I live.
Dammit I’m mad.
224-word palindrome by Demetri Martin (yeah, the comedian)
Dammit I’m mad.
Evil is a deed as I live.
God, am I reviled? I rise, my bed on a sun, I melt.
To be not one man emanating is sad. I piss.
Alas, it is so late. Who stops to help?
Man, it is hot. I’m in it. I tell.
I am not a devil. I level “Mad Dog”.
Ah, say burning is, as a deified gulp,
In my halo of a mired rum tin.
I erase many men. Oh, to be man, a sin.
Is evil in a clam? In a trap?
No. It is open. On it I was stuck.
Rats peed on hope. Elsewhere dips a web.
Be still if I fill its ebb.
Ew, a spider… eh?
We sleep. Oh no!
Deep, stark cuts saw it in one position.
Part animal, can I live? Sin is a name.
Both, one… my names are in it.
Murder? I’m a fool.
A hymn I plug, deified as a sign in ruby ash,
A Goddam level I lived at.
On mail let it in. I’m it.
Oh, sit in ample hot spots. Oh wet!
A loss it is alas (sip). I’d assign it a name.
Name not one bottle minus an ode by me:
“Sir, I deliver. I’m a dog”
Evil is a deed as I live.
Dammit I’m mad.
spikeithard
Flush
I just said this aloud to my wife and she scrunched up her face and said, "Ew, that's gross." Which is pretty much the equivalent of spike's gif I think.
DEEP THOUGHTS BY JACK HANDEY
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around the campfire and nobody got scared.
When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, mmmm boy.
If God dwells inside us like some people say, I sure hope he likes enchiladas, because that's what he's getting.
Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than a striking surface attached to a large stick.
Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on the sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell you this, but that's another weakness.
I'll never forget the time we were at the beach and buried Uncle Joe in the sand. Boy did we get in trouble. In fact, we got arrested. It turns out you can't bury people at the beach. Only at the cemetery.
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone.
If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.
If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.
I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is because they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, acting like they just woke up and say, "What was that?!?"
If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they're they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around the campfire and nobody got scared.
When you die, if you get a choice between going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if it's not, mmmm boy.
If God dwells inside us like some people say, I sure hope he likes enchiladas, because that's what he's getting.
Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than a striking surface attached to a large stick.
Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on the sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
If you think a weakness can be turned into a strength, I hate to tell you this, but that's another weakness.
I'll never forget the time we were at the beach and buried Uncle Joe in the sand. Boy did we get in trouble. In fact, we got arrested. It turns out you can't bury people at the beach. Only at the cemetery.
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone.
If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.
If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.
I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is because they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, acting like they just woke up and say, "What was that?!?"
If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they're they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.
Poker Zombie
Royal Flush
Poker Zombie
Royal Flush
To be honest, is there ever a time that Giada does not look like that?
Poker Zombie
Royal Flush
Mr Tree
Straight Flush
Good ole 400% level increase. For when you absolutely positively want to send those bitches home.
slisk250
Straight Flush
...and they rake 33%
Mr Tree
Straight Flush
Yurgh. Didn't catch that. Holy ripoff Batman
derekdd23
Flush
I also love that even If there are over 100 people they will only pay 6...
Poker Zombie
Royal Flush
It's even better when you consider that the room is only 4 tables, so to sit 60+, it's going to get a little cozy
(especially when you consider they aren't going to shut down a cash game for a tourney).
Poker Zombie
Royal Flush
It's unfortunate that "Alternates must purchase their entry into the tournament". I never knew that being an alternate was usually a free entry. I'm such a sucker...
Chicken Rob
Full House
This post makes me feel so much better of how I currently live my life, and so glad camera phones didn't exist from '85-'96.
12thMan
Full House
@jbutler latest post gives me three emotions:
1. A strong yearning for the days when literally the thing I cared most about depended on the seasons (winter: who has the best pot and where is the best snow to snowboard, summer: who has the best pot and where is the best place to ride a dirtbike and golf),
2. Admiration for the Starry Night belly copy, that's art!
and
3. Extreme nausea at the thought of those people passed out with there faces in the toilet. That shit grosses me out like almost nothing else, I can't stand the thought of any part of my body touching cold, wet, urine and shit splattered porcelain. My god, one of the first times I ever threw up from drinking I went into the bathroom and put my face down to the toilet because that's how everybody does it, I threw up the first wave and as I tried to take that violent/awkward breath(s) between pukes I suddenly realized all I could smell was piss which snapped me to attention about what I was putting my face into and my hands on. The dry heaves and resulting stomach muscle tear cured me of ever throwing up into a toilet again. It didn't cure me about throwing up from drinking (see priority list above for my early twenties schedule! lol), only from doing it in the toilet. To this day if I can't get outside to a place I can let the birds and a hose take care of things (preferred method) I will head to the bathroom...and straight to the shower. I always apologized profusely while asking where they kept there cleaning supplies, and it's been years since I've had to clean a friends shower, but yeah, if it ever happens again same rules apply!
1. A strong yearning for the days when literally the thing I cared most about depended on the seasons (winter: who has the best pot and where is the best snow to snowboard, summer: who has the best pot and where is the best place to ride a dirtbike and golf),
2. Admiration for the Starry Night belly copy, that's art!
and
3. Extreme nausea at the thought of those people passed out with there faces in the toilet. That shit grosses me out like almost nothing else, I can't stand the thought of any part of my body touching cold, wet, urine and shit splattered porcelain. My god, one of the first times I ever threw up from drinking I went into the bathroom and put my face down to the toilet because that's how everybody does it, I threw up the first wave and as I tried to take that violent/awkward breath(s) between pukes I suddenly realized all I could smell was piss which snapped me to attention about what I was putting my face into and my hands on. The dry heaves and resulting stomach muscle tear cured me of ever throwing up into a toilet again. It didn't cure me about throwing up from drinking (see priority list above for my early twenties schedule! lol), only from doing it in the toilet. To this day if I can't get outside to a place I can let the birds and a hose take care of things (preferred method) I will head to the bathroom...and straight to the shower. I always apologized profusely while asking where they kept there cleaning supplies, and it's been years since I've had to clean a friends shower, but yeah, if it ever happens again same rules apply!
spikeithard
Flush
That taped up couch pass out photo just gives me claustrophobia heebe-jeebes looking at it.
Gotta admit, I was a bit surprised at the integrity of the skirt location on this one:
And a bit disappointed at the lack of any doggy door humor from you folks. Beer can in the purse is epic.
And a bit disappointed at the lack of any doggy door humor from you folks. Beer can in the purse is epic.
Chippy McChiperson
Straight Flush
spikeithard
Flush
warning..... graphic but quite 'wtf'ish
warning..... graphic but quite 'wtf'ish
Thanks I almost threw up. Definitely wtf
Much less WTF, but i thought it was funny. I've been watching the WSOP coverage, obviously, but have also been watching Will Wheaton's tabletop gaming serioes (which, if you like games in general, is awesomely entertaining. Especially if you're also a Star Trek TNG fan)
I kept thinking, "jeez, Negreanu looks a lot like Will Wheaton with that beard..." And, well... he does!
I kept thinking, "jeez, Negreanu looks a lot like Will Wheaton with that beard..." And, well... he does!
Chicken Rob
Full House
all of your images are not showing up.
What's more, none of your images are showing up!
Create an account or login to comment
You must be a member in order to leave a comment
Create account
Create an account and join our community. It's easy!
Log in
Already have an account? Log in here.
